Shamed sugar

Well, here’s some juicy piece of the low-down I thought It’d never see the light of day but who is God right?

Well, I’m planning to go somewhere tomorrow, and normally I never have a difficult time thinking about what I’m going to throw on but this time…it’s just worse for me.

It’s not that I cannot pick a cloth, or some sort…but actually to be even more hilarious, I can’t seem to settle on a shoe. To most of you it’s quite easy yeah? Like it’s “just a bloody shoe mate! Just take a color that seems fit or matches..” which is true but here I am, on the floor looking at possibly what might be close to 50 pairs and nothing!

Well as far as I’ve reached right now, I really do not appreciate the way I want to expose myself at this point. I dont like even one bit of the way these hands are defying the gravity of my decency but I’ll deal with that part later.

Where was I?Ahh! 50 pairs mates!

Funny story is, all my life ive6gotten used to the one type of shoe that I find always appealing and blending to any extent. Closed shoes. Now the juicy part is why.

And if you’re thinking that I’m going to start off with a justifying statement so as to back up my accusation of myself then you’re damn right. After all I am human and subject to justification however the tornado swing my way. I always have backup friend.

God created me that way. From His own image and likeness. I so wish I could dump the emojis on my face right now because this is even comical to me but you know what? It’s the blunt truth.

I don’t have cute toenails. In fact, I dont even have the ability to posses nicely shaped toes. No sugar coating, this is me telling you my number one insecurity and not caring anymore by the number of laughs I’ll get by the end of this and you know why I don’t even give the infinitesimal amount of it? I believe you got it from here.

This was all because I want to wear a particular outfit so bad I’m literally taking my shoes apart looking for a “closed” shoe to go along with it but who am I kidding? What even are the chances of being successful pairing up my usual to-go shoes with a palazzo pant?

Cynical is the word readers. And why if I may ask myself was so hard for me to just not give any care to what I have traditioned myself my entire life and just pick an open shoe right?

The word is shame.

To be honest, I never saw the need to humiliate myself beyond recognition by flaunting my toes where the suns’ Ray’s beam with no fail as it screamed to everybody of it’s wierd features. And why again? As it seems today I’m on some question-asking roll but because I knew what good toes looked like and I knew mine wasn’t among that category so I have been living my best life hiding it and if it were a job then I’d probably own a lambo.

I didn’t,or don’t hate how my feet look like. I was just apparently raised up in a place where the definition of good was too pleasing to be my own. If I existed among the gorillas I bet I’d be their queen but I also bet they’d feel pretty bad about the stakes being raised so high they could never get the power even if they wanted to how bad, to change their situation.

I guess what I’m trying to convey is that we have let the society not only get to define for us what is good but also disarray our heads to thinking that apart from it, the rest is rendered useless.

But there’s one thing. The society forgets that it’s opinion is the crucial element that destroys it’s members into their own oblivion leading them to live a life that is judged without even being heard in the first place. To a place where they detach themselves from the latter that deems magnificence and finds nothing absurd about it in view of the fact that that is the platform the “opinionated ” have been set to dance on and by the look of things, they are set to compete for the finals.

This is what shame looks like when people already have theirs figured out good and yours not and with the light of that you subdue yourself to them and you begin getting along with it because at least it makes you go back home not with tears in your eyes by the end of the day.

I have always been afraid of letting the cat out of the bag, literally! But until today, that’s not going to happen because guess what ladies and gentlemen? I also have mine figured out despite the norm. All the walls I have been building since time immemorial are getting budged down and I’m coming out as someone who does not get their script written by a bunch of people God favoured heartily physically. I am acknowledging, by myself, that I am just in the same capacity as them and shouldn’t in any way be put down at any point in time just because of something I have no control over, and so should anyone feeling the same way maybe in a different situation.

Just keep in mind that if, only if,we were all apes you’d already know who would be your majesty.

Oh! I almost forgot! Guess who’s wearing open shoes tomorrow?( I so wish I could put the shades emoji right now to press my point but I’m just being humble before my creator. Spared for today peeps!)